A Survival Guide to Sarcasm; 6 Killer Comments You’ll Want to Live Without

Happiness Depends 6 Killer Comments

I come from a long line of sarcastic people. From my 92 year old grandmother right down to my 12 and 4 year old girls. We all have a quick wit, sharp tongues and the comments for better or worse, fly. What I’ve noticed, though, is that while sarcasm is part of our genetic make up, comments that we all make can be annoying, uncalled for and hardly ever positive.

Here is a helpful guide and a little insight into some different types comments:

1. Under-the-breath comment – Probably the most frustrating and comes usually from my 12 year old. It’s typically followed by me yelling, “What did you just say?!” and gets the usually snotty reply “Nothing!” What’s most annoying is that if you took the time to say it, SPEAK UP!

2. Last Word comment – “It’s going to rain today.”, “No it’s not”, “Yes it is”, “We’ll see”, “Yeah we will”, and so on and so on. Need I say more?!

3. Piss You Off comment– These can be fun when you are the instigator but not when your on the receiving end. Similar to the last word, they are the extra dings a person gives that really are unnecessary. A great example is when my grandmother told my husband that she thought he was actually much older! Ouch.

4. Know It All comment – We all know that person who has done it all, had it worse and knows more about that subject than anyone. The best way I can describe that is my husbands description of a friend who falls into this category. He says that if he said his balls hurts she would tell him hers hurts more. Enough said.

5. F-U comment (aka the quick hit)– Probably the most short and sweet of the list. The F-U comment it great to get your point across and knock ‘me to their knees. It’s often combined with the Piss You Off comment.

6. Complimentary comment– This is the most elusive and least used. These stand out because they are few and far between which probably makes them so special. They are a needed addition especially with the ongoing barrage of the other types of comments.

Every one of the aforementioned comments have their own place and are all needed at one time or another. However I recommend that you use them wisely because they can be deadly – especially if the person on the receiving end is as sarcastic as you are!

Tell us which comment you love or loathe the most.


My Kid is Bilingual: She Speaks Both English and Crazy.

Kids do say the darnedest things and mine is no exception. Forget about the sporadic and untimely outburst about the person next to us. I am talking about the things they come out with in their own words. And when I say “their own” I mean that they seem to have their own language completely.

Here are a few of my daughters latest entries into Bella’s Dictionary if 4-year-old-isms and their English translation:

Koy boy hat – cowboy hat
Jimamams – pajamas
Ear bones – ear lobes
A and p – teepee
Sprinkles – pins and needles
Spicy butt – unknown

By the time she is 6 we should be able to start a blog in this new and interesting vernacular.

Please share words from your kid’s language.


“Sometimes making memories is more important than the act itself” – Happiness Depends

I make it a point to do things with my kids for them to remember when they are older. For better or for worse, I want to be etched into their little heads forever.

Counting Sheep Is Just Not Cutting It

I was so excited to go to bed early last night – 9:30! That’s unheard of for me but I could not keep my eyes open. So as soon as I put the kids to bed, off I went as snug as a bug in a rug. Yawn!

At 1am, I heard a sound and could not fall back asleep. I tried everything. Toss, turn, toss, turn. WTH! It was just one of those nights. As soon as I got relatively comfy and started to dose off, in came a 4 year old bed bug. Then instead of my tossing and turning, it was a series of kicks and punches for the next few hours.


Happiness Depends on Counting Sheep

The moral of the story is that good things come to those who wait. Translation: I should have waited to go to sleep as usual so I’d be so deliriously tired the house could have fallen down and I wouldn’t have noticed.

Saturday Morning Torture

Whoever said that weekends are for rest never had kids! I actually torture myself because I signed up my littlest one for 9am gymnastics a couple towns away. I am not a martyr but I have not sleep past 8:30am in forever.

So here I sit “watching” the class clutching my Dunkin’ Donuts pumpkin coffee as if it was the holy grail.

Well maybe she will graduate to the 10am class! One can only hope.

Welcome to Happiness Depends!

I was thinking about what I should name this blog… Jersey Mom (too much Jersey going on), Apparent Parent (taken), Momma All the Way (nah). So I really racked my brain as to how I feel.

  • I am a mom
  • I have good days and bad days
  • I love my kids but they can drive me crazy
  • I work full time and enjoy what I do
  • I am happily married (most days)
  • I try to balance everything with a smile on my face

All true but in the end I netted out that I just want to be happy. And that all depends!

It depends on the weather, if we got out of the door on time, the amount of caffeine pumping through my veins and a million other factors that change by the minute!

So I came up with the title – “Happiness Depends

I hope you enjoy my journey!